Monday, August 29, 2011

a random post for my friends esp stj 0408. i love you guys.

They say you never appreciate what you have until you have lost it, I find that much to be true. I have friends that I cherish with my life, and when shit goes down and they are not feeling good, I feel the same pain that they do, because I really don't like to see my friends in their anguish. I appreciate them for being in my life, and for being my friends, so if anything goes down and they need a shoulder I will be there for them. However things are not always reciprocated, and that is when animosity starts to build. Some of the people I know tend to try to use me as a welcome mat, to get what they want, and not even necessarily need. I find that disrespectful because when it comes down to it, all the wants and desires become monetary. And when they have a history of being a flake when it comes to things of monetary value, it is really hard to trust them with your money that you earned, saved, and worked for. And when you do not help them out with their problems, they try to make you feel bad. That is fucked up considering all the emotional support that I gave them out of my own time, during times when I should be studying and working on projects, I was consoling them over their emotional problems. I have a mental journal of most of the shit that goes on in other people's lives because I talk to them when they are down, in tears, or torn up. But once those pieces are put back together, its like nothing ever happened before. This makes me feel a little bit unappreciated so I tend to avoid the people that do that to me, just to cut off some of the distance I have with them.

The little things that people do for you, just out of the blue lets you know that the person is thinking about you, and thanks you for being in their life. This could be from a random email saying "Hey! there really isn't a purpose in this email, other than to say hi and how are you!" to a random gift to the people just because you know that they like that item when you walk past it and you buy it for them, or a random phone call just to say hi. While I was in stj, I was going to get my books and materials of the sorts, I walked past a food stall. Knowing some of my friends and their love for food, I used some of the money that I was going to use for books to buy them food, just because I was thinking about them. The little things you do for other people can mean a whole lot in other people's eyes. These small little details can brighten up the darkest nights that the person is having, just because they know you care, and that you are there for them if they ever need someone to kick it with, to talk to, and have some genuine heart to heart with. So appreciate your friends! People come into and leave our lives constantly, those that leave are disposable anyways, but those that stay...hold on tight because they are gonna be the motherfuckers that keep you afloat when you need them. The little actions that show you care, have great reactions.

love, peace, chicken grease.

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